Over the past year a lot has happened to me. From switching schools to finding out about my mental illnesses. One thing that affected me not only mentally, but physically was being anorexic. I did not know I was anorexic till I went to my psychiatrist and she mentioned that I was after asking me A LOT of questions.
At first I was shocked to learn this about myself because I never thought I could be anorexic at all. I mean, I’m not super overweight, but I’m also not the skinniest, so I didn’t think I could have it. My psychiatrist only mentioned that it was common to be anorexic when having other mental illnesses like depression as that can affect how look at yourself and how you eat.
I then still wanted to know more questions and started researching myself about anorexia. According to the American Addiction Center, Anorexia is “is a diagnosable mental health disorder that is characterized by efforts to maintain a low weight through diet manipulation and/or excessive exercise”
NOTE: Self diagnosis is possible, but very difficult to figure out as one can be in denial about having this eating disorder or other eating disorder as well. If you think may have an eating disorder please seek help from a professional.”
Some of the symptoms include:
- Weight loss that is extreme
- Irritability
- Depressed mood
- Fainting or dizziness
- Fear of weight gain
- Lack of emotion or feeling flat
- Denying hunger or appetite
- Buying using laxatives, enemas, diets aids and/or herbal supplements.
- Dry skin or yellowing skin
- Feeling intolerant of cold weather
- Low blood pressure
- Constipation and dehydration
- Cessation of menstruation (in women)
- Insomnia and fatigue
- Suicidal thoughts
This is how your psychiatrist might diagnose you by asking you questions related to this:
According to DSM-5, the following criteria are used to diagnose anorexia:
- Ongoing restriction of caloric intake that leads to a considerable low body weight as compared to the healthy weight in the individual’s peer group
- An intense and persistent fear of becoming overweight to a point where these thoughts influence the individuals ability to gain weight or achieve a healthy weight
- Any of the following forms of distorted thinking: (1) not having a realistic interpretation of one’s shape or weight, (2) undue focus on self-evaluation of one’s weight or body shape, or (3) ongoing inability to accurately view one’s present low body
You do not have to have all these symptoms for you to have anorexia. I did not have all of them but I did have a lot of them like; insomnia and fatigue, dry skin or yellowing of skin, dizziness, intolerant of cold weather and weigh loss that is extreme.
I lost about 40 pounds in the span of 4-5 with little to no exercise. At first I thought it was good because I have had been wanting to lose weight and was very self conscious about it. But then I really started obsessing about eating and started limiting myself to eating only once a day. I would then exercise for an hour, on some occasions, but I was usually to tired to work out and would sleep a lot during the day. I also became very depressed in this time. I would be very irritable and was very sensitive.
I once cried because I lost my debit card. The thing I find funny now is that with the bank I had then I only need to go to the bank and ask for a new one and they would give it to me. LOL! So yeah it really like fucked me up.”
This was also a gateway to realizing I was bipolar. I started noticing the symptoms of this other mental disorder (yes, other because anorexia is consider a mental disorder) during these times and my symptoms got worse to the point where I could not keep a job and quit the two jobs I had.
Luckily, I am now trying to get help with my problems and am starting to eat 2-3 healthy meals a day. Although, I do sometimes have negative thoughts about my body weight I try to push them to the side and love myself for how I am. I am still trying to lose some weight, but I am doing it in a healthy way where I do not starve myself and deprive myself of things that I need to be better.
I wanted to share and write about my story because I feel like eating disorders are not talked about enough, especially in the male community. I knew nothing about this eating disorder in all honest. I, at first confused it with Bulimia, which is another very serious eating disorder. But after researching saw that they were two completely different disorders. According to Mirror Mirror, it is hard to get statistics of anorexia because of the stigma attached to it, and so, people don’t really come forward and admit to it and rather hide it. But here are some statistics on Anorexia that were collected:
- According to Mirror Mirror, Anorexia has the highest mortality rate of any mental illness.
- A study in 2003 found that people with anorexia are 56 times more likely to commit suicide than non-sufferers
- Anorexia statistics show that the disease mostly affects young women. Only about 10% of all sufferers are male.
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Although only 10% is men and the rest are woman, again this is only from the people who actually admitted to having it and seeking help from a professional. Maybe more men have this but do not seek help because they think that eating disorders can ONLY happen to woman or because of their pride and being a “man.”
Another reason why I wrote this to show the 10% or more of men that it is ok to seek help. This is also to help any woman as well. I want to bring more awareness to this issue. Hopefully someone reading this will seek help for themselves or a loved one who thinks they may need it. 🙂
J’s Journal 